(I feel the need to preface this entire post by letting every know that I've been craving a bean burrito for two weeks and my coworker just brought one in and sat down next to me to eat it. I moved.)
So if you give a girl a cookie ... If you give ME a cookie, there is only one reliable outcome. Anyone who's been in the newsroom past midnight during production week knows that if you give me a cookie it does not necessarily help me meet deadline any faster (tends to have the opposite effect, generally), and except for helping to evade a few stress-induced breakdowns, cookies don't really improve my frame of mind either. Sometimes my fingers loosen up and I work a little faster (with more typos) and sometimes I just start craving milk and can't do any more work until I've had some (the 7-11 run usually puts us another half hour behind). Sometimes I just sit in a chair and stare at the floor and whimper, "Picas. Whyyyyy?"
But always, always, if you give me a cookie, I will ask for a second one.
They say sugar is addicting and I totally agree. But I think, more than that, food is addicting (to some people). We don't live in a hunter/gatherer society where everyone subsists on grass and apple cores. We don't go for weeks without meat or bread. We don't live in India where clean drinking water is miles away. It's not a chore to eat -- something you do to stay alive, because you have to, no matter how good or bad the food tastes. You need it.
In America food is so plentiful, so affordable and of so much variety that it has almost become a way of life, rather than a means for life. Consumption? Right? We've all heard that term cynically thrown about when refering to Americans. Asking for a second cookie would seem like the obvious, most natural reaction (especially if it's a really good cookie). But as I discovered two summers ago when I went without sugar for 90 days, having access to good food can distort your appreciation of it. People begin "wolfing" their food instead of eating it -- whether or not they're even tasting it at all becomes almost an entirely different question.
(I'm reminded of the scene in Winnie the Pooh where Pooh gets stuck in Rabbit's front door - hilarious - and when Rabbit confiscates his honey he says, "But Rabbit! I don't want to eat it, I just want to taste it." We all know that's impossible. You can't taste without eating.)
Last night my family went to the beach to do hot dogs and s'mores. I said 'no' to the chips and the sodas and the bonfire-burnt sausages, but when they passed out the chocolate dribbled cookies... Well. I had one. (No judgement, folks. It was my favorite kind. I'm human, too.)
I spent about four minutes slowly picking that cookie apart, letting each flavor sit on my tongue before it finally disolved completely. And I thought to myself, Wow, that was a really good cookie. Consumerist instinct tells me there are plenty more cookies left so I should have another (a fact my mother confirms while gently shaking the package of confections.)
Normally, when you give a girl a cookie, she will ask for a second one. This time I didn't. Because I agree with Pooh - it is possible to taste and enjoy without eating in excess.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Never say 'Diet'
Explosions, weeping, skyscrapers crumbling to the ground. Imagine a herd of stampeding water buffalo (or watch The Lion King) coming straight for you - no understanding that they should stop, that you'll get hurt, that Simba's dad will die...
That's a little bit what I feel like every time I tell someone I'm on a diet. And it doesn't matter how I phrase it.
"It's a nutrition plan."
"I just want to get healthy."
"It's not about how I look, it's about how I feel." (<--definitely not totally true.)
"I ran out of money to buy more than one ounce of food a day. Bummer, right?"
People judge. I had NO IDEA people could be SO JUDGY. (I made up that word. Please forgive.) In a society where obesity is obviously a major problem, I don't understand why girls who do not appear to be overweight get picked on for trying lose weight. Like society is the know-it-all when it comes to each individual and the size they feel most comfortable with.
Just look at Kate Middleton. Gorgeous, fit, athletic. You know people were saying before her wedding that she was anorexic? Women in Hollywood get blasted for putting on a few pounds and for losing a few pounds. The magazines tie it to "mental breakdowns" or insecurity issues or whatever they have to, true or not. (I know this because it's all I see these days when I'm standing in line with my 4 lbs of fruits/vegetables at VONS around 10 p.m.).
So I'm going to say this once on this blog, and only once. (I promise). I think people need to lighten up. Seriously.
Staying in shape (or even just staying at a healthy weight) is difficult for anyone, and even harder for certain people. And while I understand that there are health concerns involved in any diet or exercise plan, I think too many people put on the "doctor" hat (I know they don't wear hats - bear with me) before even considering to put on the "friend," "cheerleader" or "support group" hat.
I don't want to point fingers or accuse good intention-ed people of ruining my day (after half a bag of carrot sticks, its not like it was shaping up to be a thriller anyway). But I do want to suggest that people, society, internet trolls or whoever happens to actually be reading this, take a look at their own actions. It isn't just what goes in our mouth that makes us healthy or sick, it's what comes out.
I know that many people need someone with the "doctor" hat to help them out. Many people use diets incorrectly and unhealthily. Many people do have insecurity issues. Instead of questing, accusing or dissenting the individual's decision, we should be looking to that person's actual needs and acting as servants, as Christ would have us act. How can we edify, uplift and support this person - maybe not in their decision about diets or "health plans" but at least in their life and their walk.
James 3: 7-8
"7 All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison."
That's a little bit what I feel like every time I tell someone I'm on a diet. And it doesn't matter how I phrase it.
"It's a nutrition plan."
"I just want to get healthy."
"It's not about how I look, it's about how I feel." (<--definitely not totally true.)
"I ran out of money to buy more than one ounce of food a day. Bummer, right?"
People judge. I had NO IDEA people could be SO JUDGY. (I made up that word. Please forgive.) In a society where obesity is obviously a major problem, I don't understand why girls who do not appear to be overweight get picked on for trying lose weight. Like society is the know-it-all when it comes to each individual and the size they feel most comfortable with.
Just look at Kate Middleton. Gorgeous, fit, athletic. You know people were saying before her wedding that she was anorexic? Women in Hollywood get blasted for putting on a few pounds and for losing a few pounds. The magazines tie it to "mental breakdowns" or insecurity issues or whatever they have to, true or not. (I know this because it's all I see these days when I'm standing in line with my 4 lbs of fruits/vegetables at VONS around 10 p.m.).
So I'm going to say this once on this blog, and only once. (I promise). I think people need to lighten up. Seriously.
Staying in shape (or even just staying at a healthy weight) is difficult for anyone, and even harder for certain people. And while I understand that there are health concerns involved in any diet or exercise plan, I think too many people put on the "doctor" hat (I know they don't wear hats - bear with me) before even considering to put on the "friend," "cheerleader" or "support group" hat.
I don't want to point fingers or accuse good intention-ed people of ruining my day (after half a bag of carrot sticks, its not like it was shaping up to be a thriller anyway). But I do want to suggest that people, society, internet trolls or whoever happens to actually be reading this, take a look at their own actions. It isn't just what goes in our mouth that makes us healthy or sick, it's what comes out.
I know that many people need someone with the "doctor" hat to help them out. Many people use diets incorrectly and unhealthily. Many people do have insecurity issues. Instead of questing, accusing or dissenting the individual's decision, we should be looking to that person's actual needs and acting as servants, as Christ would have us act. How can we edify, uplift and support this person - maybe not in their decision about diets or "health plans" but at least in their life and their walk.
James 3: 7-8
"7 All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison."
Thursday, June 21, 2012
She Bought Vegetables
I think it's important to begin by saying...One ounce is a very small amount of food. As in, my sister's hamster would scoff at the amount of morsel that is.
I bought a scale to weigh my food. I hate it. (Actually, I love it. It's stainless steel and lightened my pocket book by about $30 and it's really small and cute). I'm convinced it doesn't like me and secretly add's an 1/8 ounce to everything I weigh. Spiteful.
(Confession: I occasionally go over 1 ounce, like when I discovered that peanut butter adds an extra 0.4 ounces to my 0.9 ounce piece of bread. . . I'm not eating toast without peanut butter. Not happening. You may say, "Mary, you can't break your own rules!" to which I'll reply, "What rules? You mean the ones I arbitrarily created. Watch me arbitrarily break them! I'm still eating less than my sister's hamster!")
We've established: I don't eat much during "meal times" and that makes the workday seem like someone dropped a whale on top of me. And fruit doesn't fill the way you'd think it would. Disappointing.
So I bought vegetables.
Lots of them, really. I raided a VONS at like 9 o'clock last night and bought romaine lettuce, green bell peppers, cucumbers, carrots, grapes (not a vegetable, I know) and string peas.
I've mastered salad-making. (Secret: I use apples and dried cranberries.) I eat salads at work. I eat salads at home. I go for 5 miles, do some chin ups, drink lemon water to keep myself from vomiting up my one ounce meals and then ... I eat salad.
One ounce is not a lot of food and I know there are those of you who are still freaking out on my behalf. I want you to know that (A.) I freak out enough on my own so...Yeah. That department is covered (Please see any of my latest facebook profile pictures for substantive evidence). And (B.) I can eat fruits/vegetables whenever I want. And I do. Happily.
(The picture is actually my sister's hamster. His name is spitwad and he hisses at me in the mornings.)
Psalm 19:14
"May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, oh LORD, my rock and my redeemer."
(Confession: I occasionally go over 1 ounce, like when I discovered that peanut butter adds an extra 0.4 ounces to my 0.9 ounce piece of bread. . . I'm not eating toast without peanut butter. Not happening. You may say, "Mary, you can't break your own rules!" to which I'll reply, "What rules? You mean the ones I arbitrarily created. Watch me arbitrarily break them! I'm still eating less than my sister's hamster!")
We've established: I don't eat much during "meal times" and that makes the workday seem like someone dropped a whale on top of me. And fruit doesn't fill the way you'd think it would. Disappointing.
So I bought vegetables.
Lots of them, really. I raided a VONS at like 9 o'clock last night and bought romaine lettuce, green bell peppers, cucumbers, carrots, grapes (not a vegetable, I know) and string peas.
I've mastered salad-making. (Secret: I use apples and dried cranberries.) I eat salads at work. I eat salads at home. I go for 5 miles, do some chin ups, drink lemon water to keep myself from vomiting up my one ounce meals and then ... I eat salad.
One ounce is not a lot of food and I know there are those of you who are still freaking out on my behalf. I want you to know that (A.) I freak out enough on my own so...Yeah. That department is covered (Please see any of my latest facebook profile pictures for substantive evidence). And (B.) I can eat fruits/vegetables whenever I want. And I do. Happily.
(The picture is actually my sister's hamster. His name is spitwad and he hisses at me in the mornings.)
Psalm 19:14
"May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, oh LORD, my rock and my redeemer."
Monday, June 18, 2012
Don't start on a Monday
I should have known, really. I should have seen it coming.
Starting ANYTHING that is in any way challenging or difficult on a Monday is a bad idea. This particular Monday was a mammoth of a bad day and ... I'm a comfort eater.
Now, don't get me wrong, I held my guns.
One ounce breakfast. Done. Almost delicious, even. I was still smacking organic, natural peanut butter from my teeth when I stepped into work at 8 a.m. this morning.
Within two hours my entire day was falling apart at the seems, but I thought to myself, Hey, you're sticking to your diet and you haven't even broken into the fruit yet. You can do this!
The fruit I brought, which was mesmerizingly good, held me over until about 3 o'clock when my boss asked me to put the impossible (no, literally) on her desk by Tuesday morning, at which point I thought to myself, more fruit.
Alas! All gone.
So when my mom held out a plate of steaming, homemade lasagna and garlic cheese-bread, dripping in butter and said, "Honey, this is the last time our whole family will be together for a year. Are you sure you don't want to eat something?" I said . . .
Who starts on a Monday anyway???
Proverbs 27:1
"Do not boast about tomorrow,
for you do not know what a day may bring."
Starting ANYTHING that is in any way challenging or difficult on a Monday is a bad idea. This particular Monday was a mammoth of a bad day and ... I'm a comfort eater.
Now, don't get me wrong, I held my guns.
One ounce breakfast. Done. Almost delicious, even. I was still smacking organic, natural peanut butter from my teeth when I stepped into work at 8 a.m. this morning.
Within two hours my entire day was falling apart at the seems, but I thought to myself, Hey, you're sticking to your diet and you haven't even broken into the fruit yet. You can do this!
The fruit I brought, which was mesmerizingly good, held me over until about 3 o'clock when my boss asked me to put the impossible (no, literally) on her desk by Tuesday morning, at which point I thought to myself, more fruit.
Alas! All gone.
So when my mom held out a plate of steaming, homemade lasagna and garlic cheese-bread, dripping in butter and said, "Honey, this is the last time our whole family will be together for a year. Are you sure you don't want to eat something?" I said . . .
Who starts on a Monday anyway???
Proverbs 27:1
"Do not boast about tomorrow,
for you do not know what a day may bring."
Saturday, June 16, 2012
A new, more challenging . . . Challenge
It's been two years since I've even looked at this blog (though honestly it seems like it's been a lot longer) and the twenty-some pounds I've gained since high school are making me feel like spending so much time in the college cafeteria may not have been such a good idea.
Last time I gave myself a food challenge it was to test my self control. This time I am unashamedly going to admit that I just need to get back into a size-7 jeans.
Also, last time I challenged myself (to not eat sugar from June 1-August 31) I promised myself I would never do that again (kind of like God promising never to flood the earth again, but instead of putting a rainbow in the sky, I just downed 4 quarts of mountain dew in about one hour).
So this time I got a little creative. We all know it isn't what you eat that matters, it's how much. One cheese puff will not kill anyone. A bag of cheese puffs, consumed on a frequent basis, can have adverse effects, however.
Here's the challenge: 1 ounce meals.
Okay, health nuts, don't freak out. We all know there's no way I'm going to pull that off. And most of us know that I really only make rules so that I can create a whole bunch of exceptions to go with them. So here they are:
1. I can eat fruit/vegetables whenever I want.
2. Obviously, no snacking during the day, but I can eat "snack foods" if they fit the weight limit during appointed meal times.
3. (Until I get a weigher thingy) meals probably will be more than one ounce -- they will, however, be small enough to fit on our baby plates. Going to stick with a "spirit of the law" rather than "letter of the law" mindset here. *ahem*
4. On days when I embark on particularly strenuous adventures (hiking, long-distance running) I reserve the right to at least eat a cliff bar (most likely, it will be more than that).
5. Exceptions are subject to change depending on how the first week of this goes.
6. I can eat fruit/vegetables whenever I want. (Had to say that twice. It's important.)
I'm starting on Monday. (For those who'd like to know, I am half-way through a bag of peanut butter M&Ms right now. Delish.) So yeah... Monday.
I will post pictures as often as possible of the food I get to eat and will update this blog on the trials of ... not eating.
And finally, to add to this challenge, I'm going to find a Scripture verse for every blog post. I'm a comfort eater which got me into this in the first place (I'd like to remind you of the bag of chocolate I'm demolishing currently) and the only real comfort comes from God. Weening myself off inordinate amounts of food will only have temporary results if I don't also cultivate a taste for the sweetness of Christ during those times when hot potato-bacon soup with cheese and sour cream seems like the only way to drown my sorrows.
Philippians 4 (NIV)
"6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Last time I gave myself a food challenge it was to test my self control. This time I am unashamedly going to admit that I just need to get back into a size-7 jeans.
Also, last time I challenged myself (to not eat sugar from June 1-August 31) I promised myself I would never do that again (kind of like God promising never to flood the earth again, but instead of putting a rainbow in the sky, I just downed 4 quarts of mountain dew in about one hour).
So this time I got a little creative. We all know it isn't what you eat that matters, it's how much. One cheese puff will not kill anyone. A bag of cheese puffs, consumed on a frequent basis, can have adverse effects, however.
Here's the challenge: 1 ounce meals.
Okay, health nuts, don't freak out. We all know there's no way I'm going to pull that off. And most of us know that I really only make rules so that I can create a whole bunch of exceptions to go with them. So here they are:
1. I can eat fruit/vegetables whenever I want.
2. Obviously, no snacking during the day, but I can eat "snack foods" if they fit the weight limit during appointed meal times.
3. (Until I get a weigher thingy) meals probably will be more than one ounce -- they will, however, be small enough to fit on our baby plates. Going to stick with a "spirit of the law" rather than "letter of the law" mindset here. *ahem*
4. On days when I embark on particularly strenuous adventures (hiking, long-distance running) I reserve the right to at least eat a cliff bar (most likely, it will be more than that).
5. Exceptions are subject to change depending on how the first week of this goes.
6. I can eat fruit/vegetables whenever I want. (Had to say that twice. It's important.)
I'm starting on Monday. (For those who'd like to know, I am half-way through a bag of peanut butter M&Ms right now. Delish.) So yeah... Monday.
I will post pictures as often as possible of the food I get to eat and will update this blog on the trials of ... not eating.
And finally, to add to this challenge, I'm going to find a Scripture verse for every blog post. I'm a comfort eater which got me into this in the first place (I'd like to remind you of the bag of chocolate I'm demolishing currently) and the only real comfort comes from God. Weening myself off inordinate amounts of food will only have temporary results if I don't also cultivate a taste for the sweetness of Christ during those times when hot potato-bacon soup with cheese and sour cream seems like the only way to drown my sorrows.
Philippians 4 (NIV)
"6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
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